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"The Top 7 Butterbodies" - Nick Coles
The true definition of a butterbody is a woman who has a beautiful face but a body that’s gone to butter. It’s like the butterface, but in reverse. If you are rich and famous, there is no excuse for being a butterbody. It’s your job to look fit and hot. Celebrities are not like normal people. They have the means to pay for a full time trainer and for someone to prepare their meals.

7. Sara Ramirez"...when plus-sized women gain fame, they slim down and lose the pounds. Not Sara. She has remained true to her pudgy self..."

6. Drew Barrymore

"...She says she basically lives on carbs and eats whatever she wants...every hot woman in Hollywood will adopt a similar mentality and the world will be void of super thin, super hot women..."

5. Salma Hayek (are you kidding me)

"...This lady is fat. It’s like she’s carrying a spare car tire around her mid-section.."

4. America Ferrera

"...It’s crazy that she has become a poster child for “curvy” women. She basically gives women an excuse to be fat..."

3. Mandy Moore

"...Recently she re-emerged looking chunky, pudgy and out of shape. It’s like she spent the last few years on a couch watching television and eating tubs of Neapolitan ice cream..."

2. Liv Tyler"...The angelic film star used to be one of the world’s most beautiful women. Now she looks like a dowdy housewife who indulges in too many home-baked cookies..."

1. Tyra Banks

"...If Tyra Banks really wants to be the next Oprah, she should take a leaf out of Oprah’s book and drop 40 pounds..."

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I really don't want a(nother) reason to question my faith in the average male's stereotypical standards of beauty, but congrats Nick Coles, you have done it for me. The truly sad thing is that there are men - no wait, asshats - out there like you who believe in this bullshit. Get your head out of those Victoria's Secret catalogs, put down the beer and grow some balls, which probably won't be much help for you, since you don't seem like you plan to get laid. Ever. Mother must be so proud.

/rant

Edit: to see the original article, give them hell here