For 5 random people in my life right now. I'm keeping them anonymous, I just have stuff in my mind.
-Although you're closer to one of my family members than me, I look at you as one of my siblings. If you ever need someone for guidance or even someone to talk to, about anything, just let me know. It seems like things have been hard for you lately, although you don't let it show, but I just want you to know that I'm willing to listen.
-No matter how long I don't get to see or spend time with you (which can be up to months), you are one of the people that I know I can just let loose and be myself with, whether it's "Fun" Kristine or "Boring" Kristine, you don't give a shit. I just want to thank you because you are one of the only people to bring out the crazier sides of me that no one really sees but at the same time accepts me for who I am 110%.
-I miss you, and I haven't even been able to get an update from you in quite some time. I honestly miss just spending time with you because it's always a guaranteed good mixture of laughs and heart-to-hearts. So many of my most memorable high school experiences were shared with you, it would just be a shame to lose touch now.
-What can I say, you probably know me better than I know myself at times. Even at my worst you make me feel fresh, and dope, and all these things that I wish I could live up to 24/7 haha. I know you can be hard on yourself sometimes, but just because I don't say it all the time does not mean I don't think you are - simply put - an amazing person. One of the best things about you is that you keep me on my toes and always thinking and challenging myself. More than anything, you are my best friend.
-I just remember thinking "I don't think I'm ever going to get along with this person" and what do you know, you turned out to be one of the coolest people I know - no number of superlatives could even attempt to explain your awesomeness. I'm extremely proud of you, you have gone above and beyond my expectations of what you would accomplish at this phase in your life, and you're not even close to being done! You have huge things ahead of you, and I know it may not seem like it at times, but I look up to you more than you know.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Lessons Learned
I was so excited to finally hit good ol' summer once I finished finals, and for the most part, I was just happy to get some down time without having to think about studying for my next quiz or what I'm going to write about for my next paper. To be honest, I was just soo over school and wanted to give my brain a rest. But surprisingly, with so much time in my hands at the apartment, driving to and fro SD/Irvine, or even sitting at my desk at work for 7 hours everyday, I've just been thinking away 24/7 about life in general. I've been able to nitpick and analyze so many issues that I couldn't really wrap my brain around while trying to juggle school and work, and right now I feel like things are so much clearer to me than ever before. Who knew I would be able to learn so much this summer season? You won't believe all the little things that you realize when the time seems to pass slower and the days are longer.
First of all, I've realized that definitely not the same person I was a couple years ago, more beliefs/perspectives-wise than anything else. Even reading back to my xanga from 2 years ago seems completely foreign to me. I've really changed my outlooks on various aspects of life, from relationships, true friends, my future, priorities, ideals, and almost everything else under the sun. I think I've adopted a more "It is what it is" motto for life at the moment, going from a somewhat naive way of thinking to a more realistic one; life will throw you some serious curveballs (as I've learned myself as well as talking to some good friends this past month) and sometimes there's really nothing you can do about it except to make the best of it. I see now that some things you perceived as perfect before can come crashing down any second and that some things don't last forever, no matter how much you feel it should be otherwise. I don't want it to sound like I'm more accepting of those downs you experience in life or like I'm not as hopeful, because honestly I think it has only made me more appreciative of the "now", with me making more of an effort to not take anything for granted. I'm trying to avoid not knowing what I've got until it's gone.
Although I make the drive from Irvine to San Diego weekly, my most recent trip kind of solidified this new perspective. Two summers ago, I got into this bad car accident on the 5 after I did a 360 on the freeway and finally hit a side of a hill on the right side of the road. This time, I really paid attention to the area where it happened (right before the Manchester exit) and noticed that not even 50 meters before that was a view point - only 2 flimsy fences separate you from the fall off the freeway, and if I had spun out a few seconds before I did, who knows what the outcome would have been... The point I'm trying to get to is that I always used to think of "what ifs" in my life whenever I would feel empty at times or wished for something more. Now when those cross my mind, I try to focus on all the blessings in my life and realize how lucky I am just to be right here, right now. I'm not trying to make this post seem self-serving, but these are just some thoughts in my head that I want to put out there while they're still clear.
A little off topic but something that really makes my day is when the things I post about are actually relevant to life! Haha. Lately I've been having conversations with people or events happen and I would just think "Wow I blogged about that" or "Hmm must have read my post" lol - it's nice to know that the things that go through my head aren't so pointless after all (Soulmates, shmoulmates or They Say You Want a Revolution are 2 posts that come to mind, particularly the balance issue mentioned in the latter).
Even though I haven't done anything that exciting yet this summer, it's been great for me so far. Hopefully by the end of September I'll have more answers to life's questions, or better yet have more questions to challenge myself with.
First of all, I've realized that definitely not the same person I was a couple years ago, more beliefs/perspectives-wise than anything else. Even reading back to my xanga from 2 years ago seems completely foreign to me. I've really changed my outlooks on various aspects of life, from relationships, true friends, my future, priorities, ideals, and almost everything else under the sun. I think I've adopted a more "It is what it is" motto for life at the moment, going from a somewhat naive way of thinking to a more realistic one; life will throw you some serious curveballs (as I've learned myself as well as talking to some good friends this past month) and sometimes there's really nothing you can do about it except to make the best of it. I see now that some things you perceived as perfect before can come crashing down any second and that some things don't last forever, no matter how much you feel it should be otherwise. I don't want it to sound like I'm more accepting of those downs you experience in life or like I'm not as hopeful, because honestly I think it has only made me more appreciative of the "now", with me making more of an effort to not take anything for granted. I'm trying to avoid not knowing what I've got until it's gone.
Although I make the drive from Irvine to San Diego weekly, my most recent trip kind of solidified this new perspective. Two summers ago, I got into this bad car accident on the 5 after I did a 360 on the freeway and finally hit a side of a hill on the right side of the road. This time, I really paid attention to the area where it happened (right before the Manchester exit) and noticed that not even 50 meters before that was a view point - only 2 flimsy fences separate you from the fall off the freeway, and if I had spun out a few seconds before I did, who knows what the outcome would have been... The point I'm trying to get to is that I always used to think of "what ifs" in my life whenever I would feel empty at times or wished for something more. Now when those cross my mind, I try to focus on all the blessings in my life and realize how lucky I am just to be right here, right now. I'm not trying to make this post seem self-serving, but these are just some thoughts in my head that I want to put out there while they're still clear.
A little off topic but something that really makes my day is when the things I post about are actually relevant to life! Haha. Lately I've been having conversations with people or events happen and I would just think "Wow I blogged about that" or "Hmm must have read my post" lol - it's nice to know that the things that go through my head aren't so pointless after all (Soulmates, shmoulmates or They Say You Want a Revolution are 2 posts that come to mind, particularly the balance issue mentioned in the latter).
Even though I haven't done anything that exciting yet this summer, it's been great for me so far. Hopefully by the end of September I'll have more answers to life's questions, or better yet have more questions to challenge myself with.
One more month until Summer Olympics...
which means one more month until -
Oh yes. He only looks good when he's in his element to be honest, but WOW.
More interesting post coming soon.
More interesting post coming soon.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Dear Disney,
I was right there with you during the Miley Cyrus Vanity Fair fiasco. You reprimanded her for a photoshoot which was inappropriate for someone her age and with her being in the spotlight with so much influence over your viewers (or more importantly, being one of your most important cash cows), you made sure she would make better decisions to uphold her image as a "role model".
An even older example of Disney starlets gone wild is the BBV scandal, which I'm sure I don't really need to say much about. But you didn't really say anything about that, and at the time I thought I could let this slide as well.
So I was really surprised to hear that you play the new Jesse McCartney video on your channel. Haha, Jesse McCartney, harmless right?
First of all, one of the opening shots is of the girl in the video with her pants already unbuttoned. Then there's the laying on top of each other on the bed, untying of the bra, fooling around in the back of the car, the obvious sexual tension throughout the entire video...
If you're going to give Miley Cyrus shit about her pictures (I'm not even a huge fan of her), then at least don't half ass it and actually impose your "wholesome only" policy to everything else on the network. I don't think of myself as a prude and hell I even like the song - in a guilty pleasure sorta way of course - and I don't have a problem with the video, but I do have a problem with it playing on your channel if you're going to be a hypocrite about it.
Sometimes I think trying to shove this wholesome image down our throats just backfires. Take for example Disney stars such as the Jonas Brothers and Selena Gomez openly talking about their purity rings and how they are saving themselves for marriage. I think if you want to wait until marriage to have sex, than by all means go for it, props to you for standing by your beliefs. But to have 12 year olds make a purity pledge and talk about it in public? First of all, no 12-year old needs to be thinking about this sort of stuff anyways. Making a 12-year old promise on a decision about an issue they don't even really know about doesn't make sense to me. Second of all, especially if you're a pre-teen, no one needs to know your business about your sex/lack-of-it life. Making your stars talk about such issues only sexualizes them more in my eyes. But whatever, it's as if it's in your guys' contract to say this stuff.
No love,
Me
An even older example of Disney starlets gone wild is the BBV scandal, which I'm sure I don't really need to say much about. But you didn't really say anything about that, and at the time I thought I could let this slide as well.
So I was really surprised to hear that you play the new Jesse McCartney video on your channel. Haha, Jesse McCartney, harmless right?
First of all, one of the opening shots is of the girl in the video with her pants already unbuttoned. Then there's the laying on top of each other on the bed, untying of the bra, fooling around in the back of the car, the obvious sexual tension throughout the entire video...
If you're going to give Miley Cyrus shit about her pictures (I'm not even a huge fan of her), then at least don't half ass it and actually impose your "wholesome only" policy to everything else on the network. I don't think of myself as a prude and hell I even like the song - in a guilty pleasure sorta way of course - and I don't have a problem with the video, but I do have a problem with it playing on your channel if you're going to be a hypocrite about it.
Sometimes I think trying to shove this wholesome image down our throats just backfires. Take for example Disney stars such as the Jonas Brothers and Selena Gomez openly talking about their purity rings and how they are saving themselves for marriage. I think if you want to wait until marriage to have sex, than by all means go for it, props to you for standing by your beliefs. But to have 12 year olds make a purity pledge and talk about it in public? First of all, no 12-year old needs to be thinking about this sort of stuff anyways. Making a 12-year old promise on a decision about an issue they don't even really know about doesn't make sense to me. Second of all, especially if you're a pre-teen, no one needs to know your business about your sex/lack-of-it life. Making your stars talk about such issues only sexualizes them more in my eyes. But whatever, it's as if it's in your guys' contract to say this stuff.
No love,
Me
Monday, June 16, 2008
Soulmates, shmoulmates
The weekend before finals I was lucky enough to witness Will & Cynthia Adan tie the knot in a beautiful wedding ceremony. After about 7 years of being together, they finally got married, and anyone that knows Will & Cynch definitely sees them as one of those couples that gives hope that true love really does exist in this world. Again, congrats to the newlyweds and I wish only the best of luck in the future!
I wanted to start this blog this way because we can all relate when I say there are those couples we look at and automatically think "that's what soulmates are". Although I'm not denying the fact that people may end up with their "soulmate" in the end, I really hate the idea of how your supposed to meet your soulmate and determine whether they are or not in fixed period of time - in all honesty, I think it's when people get into relationships and have that mentality that problems start to arise real fast.
A couple weeks ago at work I was listening to this radio segment about a woman who is married but felt that she had met her soulmate in one of her previous relationships. Basically she was saying that she felt terrible that she let her soulmate go, and by marrying her husband, she was only "settling for less". She was contemplating whether to leave her husband or not so she could be reunited with her former love. What the hell woman. Why do people feel the need to put these labels on someone, it (unnecessarily) makes things more complicated. If this woman didn't think in this "we're meant to be" mentality, she wouldn't have even put herself in this situation. She just needs to get that idea out of her head and maybe spend some time putting effort into her marriage? I don't know, that idea is just too out there for some people I guess. This woman also wasn't ready for marriage in my opinion, but that marriage rant would require another post...
That being said, I still believe in soulmates. The thing is, I don't believe that you meet this person and predetermine "soulmate or not soulmate" in a certain amount of time, even a couple years seems too short to me. To me someone has to become your soulmate, and I think that's something that people always tend to forget; relationships aren't just a given, you have to actually put some hard work and effort into it - the real ones aren't made of the fluffy bullshit they feed you in the movies. I don't even think someone deserves to be called your soulmate until you've been to hell and back with this person and in the end, they are still there and love you the way you are, flaws and all.
Another thing is that I don't think people should have intentions of finding Mr./Mrs. Right when they are only beginning to talk to someone. People have such high expectations of what the right person should be, of course everyone they meet is going to fall short. It's totally fine to talk to someone and enjoy their company just for the hell of it. Remember, it is what it is.
/end soulmate&relationship wank
P.S. Sometimes I'm not sure whether being in a long relationship either makes me really knowledgeable about this stuff or completely clueless. I've experienced so many aspects of relationships with Raf , but when it comes to the actual dating scene I'm like a fish out of water...
I wanted to start this blog this way because we can all relate when I say there are those couples we look at and automatically think "that's what soulmates are". Although I'm not denying the fact that people may end up with their "soulmate" in the end, I really hate the idea of how your supposed to meet your soulmate and determine whether they are or not in fixed period of time - in all honesty, I think it's when people get into relationships and have that mentality that problems start to arise real fast.
A couple weeks ago at work I was listening to this radio segment about a woman who is married but felt that she had met her soulmate in one of her previous relationships. Basically she was saying that she felt terrible that she let her soulmate go, and by marrying her husband, she was only "settling for less". She was contemplating whether to leave her husband or not so she could be reunited with her former love. What the hell woman. Why do people feel the need to put these labels on someone, it (unnecessarily) makes things more complicated. If this woman didn't think in this "we're meant to be" mentality, she wouldn't have even put herself in this situation. She just needs to get that idea out of her head and maybe spend some time putting effort into her marriage? I don't know, that idea is just too out there for some people I guess. This woman also wasn't ready for marriage in my opinion, but that marriage rant would require another post...
That being said, I still believe in soulmates. The thing is, I don't believe that you meet this person and predetermine "soulmate or not soulmate" in a certain amount of time, even a couple years seems too short to me. To me someone has to become your soulmate, and I think that's something that people always tend to forget; relationships aren't just a given, you have to actually put some hard work and effort into it - the real ones aren't made of the fluffy bullshit they feed you in the movies. I don't even think someone deserves to be called your soulmate until you've been to hell and back with this person and in the end, they are still there and love you the way you are, flaws and all.
Another thing is that I don't think people should have intentions of finding Mr./Mrs. Right when they are only beginning to talk to someone. People have such high expectations of what the right person should be, of course everyone they meet is going to fall short. It's totally fine to talk to someone and enjoy their company just for the hell of it. Remember, it is what it is.
/end soulmate&relationship wank
P.S. Sometimes I'm not sure whether being in a long relationship either makes me really knowledgeable about this stuff or completely clueless. I've experienced so many aspects of relationships with Raf , but when it comes to the actual dating scene I'm like a fish out of water...
Thursday, June 12, 2008
About time biotch
It took a couple weeks longer than most of you and back to back sleepless nights, but summer is finally here for me! Took my last 2 finals this morning, and I am happy to say that I was pleasantly surprised with how I felt walking out of both of my classes. Kicked multiple ass uggggh son. Haha fck I'm so happy, I don't really have anything else to say right now, I just needed to get this out. Good job UC kids.
Potential topics for upcoming posts (after I've had a little more time to recover):
-Summer schedule/stuff to look forward to
-Personal wank on the classic idea of "soulmates" and why it's stupid
-Second-hand embarassment. I seriously can't take it.
Potential topics for upcoming posts (after I've had a little more time to recover):
-Summer schedule/stuff to look forward to
-Personal wank on the classic idea of "soulmates" and why it's stupid
-Second-hand embarassment. I seriously can't take it.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Reason #58 Why I'd Still Be Reluctant on Having Kids...
Daaamn. If I ever did that to my parents, it would either be my dad's belt across my ass or my mom's tsinelas across my face. Seriously though, how do parents even let their kids get to this level? I do have to note though that this mother lost her daughter 3 years ago to brain cancer, and I guess this is the boy's way of lashing out to get the attention that was always directed to his sister. But still, I would not have taken that bitchslap as easily as she did.
My parents never really hit me as a kid, but I would not be reluctant to administer some good ol' spanking to my kids if they tried to pull something even close to this. I know some people would be quick to scream "child abuse" but really, I know enough people that grew up where that was a form of punishment (including some family members) and they turned out perfectly fine lol. Besides, spanking a little kid does not equate to beating or teaching that "violence is the key", in my opinion. I'm tired of seeing little brats in the grocery store/mall with parents who cannot enforce any discipline upon their kids whatsoever.
Although I don't need to worry about kids for a while, my worst nightmare would be waking up one day and realizing I brought up a monster like this one:
*edit: WTF great minds think alike I guess LOL
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